WE’RE all aware of the ‘friends to lovers’ trope – from rom-coms such as When Harry Met Sally and Notting Hill to real-life stories like McFly frontman Tom Fletcher and his now-wife Giovanna meeting at school.
Friendships to flings is a well-trodden path that makes for some of the best love stories – but what are the signs to look out for showing romance is blossoming between two pals?
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Fans are convinced American singer JoJo Siwa, 21, and British reality TV star Chris Hughes, 32, are the latest example of friends-to-lovers after they struck up an unlikely friendship on the latest series of Celebrity Big Brother (CBB).
The pair, who insist they are “soulmates” in a purely platonic way, were seen sneaking into each other’s beds, cuddling, canoodling in the hot tub and even exchanging massages.
JoJo reportedly dumped her partner Kath Ebbs, 27, who admitted to being “hurt” by what they saw, just hours after the season finale.
This sent the rumour mill swirling, with fans convinced JoJo and Chris fell in love during their CBB stint – perhaps him more so than her.
“Falling in love has a profound effect on your body language,” body language expert Judi James tells The Sun.
“Many of those effects are physiological, which means they’re impossible to suppress.”
Despite this, someone who’s in love with their best friend will try to suppress the feelings and avoid letting on. This then manifests in physiological responses.
“Think blushing, pupil dilation, an increase in eye contact, synchronised movement and even the very obvious signs of sexual arousal during what are supposed to be platonic touch rituals like hugging,” says Judi.
We take a look at the seven subtle signs your friend is secretly in love with you but pretending otherwise.
1. Physical closeness
Like all creatures with natural instincts for self-preservation, we don’t typically allow just anyone into our personal space.
So, if your best friend frequently lingers in your personal bubble, often standing or sitting closer than you’d expect for a platonic relationship, there’s a good chance they might have romantic feelings for you.
“One of the main signs that your BFF is attracted to you is their physical closeness,” comments Adam Lyons, relationship psychology expert and founder of Ask the Dating Coach.
“If your friend keeps getting close to you, such as leaning in during conversation, or giving long, prolonged hugs, it could be a major sign.”
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However, if you confront them about it, don’t be surprised if they suddenly withdraw from any physical contact to conceal their feelings.
That’s because when intimacy isn’t reciprocated, they may pull back to shield themselves from the emotional pain of unrequited affection.
2. Taking control
When your best friend is falling in love with you – or already has – they may feel overwhelmed by the intensity of their emotions.
To manage this, they often resort to body language that projects power, trying to mask the vulnerability they feel, says Judi.
This dynamic was evident on Celebrity Big Brother, when Chris lay on JoJo’s lap and “adopted a very performatively relaxed-looking pose” by placing his hands behind his head, trying to appear calm and in control.
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“There was one even more significant move: his exaggerated pit-baring stance,” Judi analyses.
“Showing off his upper arm muscles by placing his hands behind his head is a display of confidence and power, suggesting he’s trying hard to stay in control.”
3. Jealousy
Jealousy is a raw emotion that speaks louder than words, revealing people’s deepest insecurities and unacknowledged desires.
If your best pal exhibits envy regarding any romance or potential suitors in your life, they might have undisclosed feelings for you.
“Pay attention if they seem uncomfortable or dismissive when you talk about dating someone else,” says Adam. “Jealousy can be a subtle indicator that their feelings might just go beyond friendship.”
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Indeed, we see Sally Albright’s jealousy against Harry Burns’ sexcapades with other women come to the forefront in the iconic diner scene in When Harry Met Sally (1989).
Much like in films, those secretly in love with a friend will often mask their envy behind a façade of concern or criticism, disguising their true feelings with calculated subtlety.
4. Hidden expressions
If your best friend is secretly in love with you, their facial expressions may betray them without them even realising.
When Chris and JoJo shared an intimate hug in the CBB kitchen, his “wistful” expression revealed his true emotions, exposing he was trying to hide romantic feelings towards JoJo, claims Judi.
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“Hugging can be a gesture of close friendship but also a display of love and passion. If one converts to the other, the signs will often only be hidden from the other person,” she explains.
“Chris’s caring and wistful facial expression as his head is visible over JoJo’s shoulder, hints that, for him, it’s a lot deeper and more meaningful.”
Other covert signs that snitch on a best friend in love are subtle lip biting, wide eyes and blushing or flushed cheeks.
5. Priorities
“If your best friend goes out of their way to prioritise your needs, like cancelling plans for you, it might mean they’re invested in you in a way that’s more than platonic,” says relationship psychologist Adam.
He also pointed out that friends who “always seem available” could have more-than-platonic feelings.
We saw this play out between JoJo and Chris on CBB, who prioritised each other over everyone else, and even prioritised a cuddle before bed over a good night’s sleep.
What to do if you think your BFF is secretly in love with you
Adam Lyons, psychology expert and founder of Ask the Dating Coach, has shared his top tips for dealing with a best friend who might be in love with you…
1. Assess your own feelings
If you think your best friend is in love with you, the first thing to do is assess your own feelings. If you’re into them too, then great, this could be the start of something amazing. But don’t just dive in.
2. Test the waters
Test the waters by spending more time together in ways that could naturally escalate, like a one-on-one dinner or a deeper conversation about relationships. If they’re giving you signs like prolonged eye contact, prioritising you over others, or subtle jealousy then it’s time to have an honest talk. Be direct but kind: “I feel like there might be something more between us. Am I imagining that, or do you feel it too?”
3. Approach with caution
Now, if you don’t feel the same way, it’s all about handling it with care. The worst thing you can do is ignore it or lead them on. Acknowledge their feelings if they’ve expressed them, and set clear boundaries. Something like: “I value our friendship so much, and I don’t want to risk losing it. I hope we can keep things as they are because I truly cherish having you in my life.”
4. Be honest
The key in both scenarios is honesty. Whether you’re moving forward romantically or keeping it platonic, clear communication is what keeps the relationship, whatever form it takes, healthy and respectful.
However, body language expert Judi warned that taking this for granted from your best friend who’s secretly in love with you could be “cruel if you have no intention to reciprocate”.
“The balance in your friendship will be tilted forever, so sometimes it can be more tactful to opt to politely ignore any suspicions you might have,” she says.
6. Eye contact
Prolonged eye contact is another big sign your best friend is in love with you, says Adam.
“If they’re locking eyes with you a lot more than they usually do, it could be their way of trying to connect with you on a more romantic level,” he tells The Sun.
If they’re trying to hide their feelings from you, they might feel inclined to cover their face to make eye contact less intense, such as Chris did during his This Morning interview with JoJo after leaving the CBB house.
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“There can be a subliminal desire to cover the face to avoid revealing fonder feelings that can be impossible to suppress,” explains Judi, “like a softened smile, a desire to face-gaze and to tune in by using increased eye contact.
“Bringing a hand up to the face in a partial cut-off can suggest a desire to mask the emotions.
“The end result in Chris’ This Morning interview is that he looked as though he was distancing himself and disengaging physically.”
7. Nervousness
Adam urged people who think their best friend is in love with them to always look out for nervousness.
“If your friend suddenly seems awkward around you, like if they’re stumbling over words or fidgeting a lot, they might be struggling to hide their true feelings,” he says.
People often get nervous around someone they’re secretly in love with because of the vulnerability and fear of rejection that come with having deep, unspoken feelings.
When you’re in love with someone, there’s a heightened sense of emotional exposure; every interaction feels more significant, and even the smallest detail might be misinterpreted.
Judi adds: “There can even be displays of irritation or sudden mood swings caused by frustration at keeping the feelings of love under wraps.
“These can be confusing for the other person who might feel they are being cold-shouldered or rejected.”