Ina Garten fans hold her nearly 60-year marriage to Jeffrey Garten in as high regard as her culinary prowess, but the “Barefoot Contessa” laid bare the long-time couple’s struggles early in their union that almost led to divorce.
The Brooklyn native, 76, revealed in an excerpt from her memoir, “Be Ready When the Luck Happens,” that separated from the esteemed economist for a period in the 1970s. The pair, who wed in 1968, had been working in the White House when Ina left Washington, D.C., for her Barefoot Contessa store in the Hamptons.
“When I bought Barefoot Contessa, I shattered our traditional roles. … While I was still cooking, cleaning, shopping, managing at the store, I was doing it as a businesswoman, not a wife. My responsibilities made it impossible for me to even think about anything else,” Garten wrote in an excerpt of the memoir, out Oct. 1, published by People.
“Jeffrey was fully formed and living the life he wanted to live. I wasn’t and I wouldn’t be able to figure out who I was or what I wanted unless I was on my own. I needed that freedom.”
Though she contemplated divorce, Garten “loved Jeffrey and didn’t want to shock — or hurt – him, so I’d start by suggesting we pause for a separation.”
Looking back, Garten acknowledges “how crazy that was and how dangerous it was, but we wouldn’t have the relationship we have now if I hadn’t done it.” Though “the hardest thing I ever did,” Garten said the separation was necessary.
After a period apart, Garten realized she wanted to be married but “just couldn’t live with him in a traditional ‘man and wife’ relationship.” She told Jeffrey, now Dean Emeritus of the Yale School of Management, that he needed to go to therapy if they were to get back together.
“One hour, that’s all Jeffrey needed,” Garten told People. “He went once for an hour and totally got it.”
Ultimately, the separation “changed him, but it also changed me too,” Garten told the magazine.
